Day 2 of my War on Tobacco, Wounded, but pushing forward!!!

Succubus

I want you to hold your breath. Now keep holding it. Don’t breath… go as long as you can… feel your heart speed up? Feel your arms begin to tremble… an uneasyness starts to swell and then panic begins to set in. WHOOOSH you gasp for air and suddenly feel relief. Phew! For me it brings a new appreciation for the air we breath.
Now what if i were to tell you that you weren’t allowed to take that breath? Even though everybody around you was breathing all the time… that YOU… could NEVER take another breath again. Its BAD for you even though everything in your core tells you its what you need…

“Don’t worry, I tell you, “You will be fine.”
Perhaps a little cranky for the first few days but you will get through it. Its no big deal.
That is what it is like to quit smoking.
Cigarrette butts are pretty much universally regarded as disgusting things. The majority of people who see a half-smoked ciggarette butt sitting on the ground (if they notice at all) probably think: “Eww Gross”

Succubus

Succubus

But to the fresh non-smoker, seeing one of your old butts can seem a little different… A little less icky.
Sitting by my porch all day long as i went in and out of the house i kept noticing it. Taunting me. Teasing me. Tempting me.
By 3 o-clock the succubus had me. I took it to my toaster to light it (all lighters in the home have been stashed in some undisclosed location for my own safety).
I smoked it.
After i finished it… i didn’t feel relief. I didn’t feel better. I didn’t even feel guilty.
I just wanted more. And i was reminded that you can’t just have one smoke. It doesnt work that way. 1 leads to 2. 2 to 4. Then your buying packs.

Yet undeterred I shall trudge forth. Time is what i need to claim. Each little minute a little victory.
Overall i completed the day on about 1/10th the nicotine levels that my bloodstream is accustomed too. So with that one exception i’m declaring Day 2 a win.

2 days smoke free  (mostly).

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